My dad is rather infamous for having "peanut butter in his ears," as my family says. This means that people will say one thing to him, but he'll hear something completely and comically different. This trait seems to be genetic, as I'm exhibiting symptoms.
Just this "morning" (read: 3 o'clock in the afternoon), I swear Forrest told me, "Double chlorinated!" as I left the room. He claims to have said, "Don't let the door hit you on the way out." Even a phonetic analysis can only give me an excuse for the first d-plus-vowel and matching up "-ted" with "hit". Cursèd genes!